speared and shafted
Mood:  don't ask
Now Playing: billy bragg saturday boy
Topic: qualifying
The title gives it away..I got shafted at a real life auction. Well and truly. I had enterted several lots in a specialist auction and the auction house blocked all the lots together and right at the end of the list. I did okay on one lot, broke even on another two, but my final lot, comprising several items, was announced as one item, which confused those left in the room and the hammer went down at ?20. It had cost me ?70 top buy them. I was very annoyed as they should have made much more. However, I may be able to make up some of the shortfall as I bought a couple of lots at knockdown prices. Fingers cross. However, I won't be dealing with that particular auction house again. It was my first time selling with them too, so they have lost a lot of potential future trade, plus I'll bad mouth them at every opportunity I get.

bumped and bounced
Mood:  blue
Now Playing: La-la-la de de da
Topic: concrete burnt goldfish
Interesting week - three auctions in two days, just for the hell of it. Firstly, I went to my local auction hous and got blown out for a Lot of books. The place was heaving though, as there was a specialist pottery sale on. I managed to force the price up for someone else though. From there I went to a sale in Melbourne, near York, and filled my boots with cheap stuff - including three Ivory figurines which I got for the knockdown price of #4. Bargain. I also got a Navy 1941 telescope at a good price, but let myself down with a clock which I bid on without having looked at it properly. As soon as I collected it I realised it was a fake. Paid #15. Bummer.My fault entirely, so I'll put that down to experience and in the bid.
At yet another auction I bought some militaria and some silverware. And I was not a happy puppy as I suspect that I got bounced by a ghost bidder.... twice. The first time it happened I thought it was a fluke, but then it happened again. For those who don't know, a ghost bidder is someone who doesn't exist - the auctioneer pretends that someone behind you is bidding to force up the price. Why do I think I was ghosted? Well, on both occasions I had stopped bidding, a higher price was called by the auctioneer, then bam, my number was announced as the winner.On both occasions, I was certain that someone else had won the item..Okay, I'm not talking much money here, maybe #30-40 but it's the principle. I don't like to think I have been cheated, so that's one auction I will not be attending again.

remember you're a wombell
Mood:  accident prone
Now Playing: Leather bound and bedshaped
Topic: Against the law
I thought I'd try a new auction today, so I nipped over to York for a sale at Wombell's - yep, that really is the name. The auction gallery is on a trading estate and although I know the area I got hopelessly lost amid the morass one way streets. I got there five minutes before the auction was due to start and as I result I didn't get chance to view anything. Hmmm, dilemma then. Should I stay or should I go. I decided on the former but that meant I had to bid "blind" for items I hadn't seen. Not a good idea. But, it was either that or go home empty handed. remarkably, I didn't do too badly. I bought two lots of books, some of which were from the 1700s and on which I should be able to make a profit - if not they are interesting enough to keep I also bought some unframed oil paintings, all of which are pants. But they were cheap, so who cares.
Next week there are two days of auctions, so that should be interesting...

Foibles and other ibles
Mood:  cheeky
Now Playing: Budgie songs for ailing flight stewards
Topic: Stavanger trumpeting

What a difference a week makes...Last Saturday, I went to the monthly auction at York, where everything is enormously cheap. I bought an old razor and a set of golf clubs for ?2...including golf trolley. I though that was a good deal, and it was. But not for me. Because I am right handed and when I got home I discovered that all the clubs were for a left handed player. D'oh! So, I gave them to a friend who is left handed. I even bought a box of how to play golf manuals, which I also gave to him.
This week, I went to an auction in Scarborough, which is always very expensive. Today was no different and no less expensive. I bought an oil painting. It was quite expensive but very nice. I may keep it or I may re-auction it but, I predict, I'll struggle to make a profit.
I did manage to sell a painting last week though for a 1000% profit...them's the auctions you need...

learning from experience
Mood:  vegas lucky
Now Playing: Cats with socks on their heads
Topic: Spangles
I learned something this weekend which I have probably always known subconsciously but never really acknowledged.....it is always worth bidding at a real life auction for a lot in which no one else has shown an interest. I have reached this conclusion after visiting an auction on Sunday near Hull. I went for a specific lot and won it, for a price, and was pleased with myself because among the box of books I knew there was one very valuable item - a book from 1755 and in good condition. While I was there however I bid on the spare of the moment for four boxes of books as no one else was bothering. I got them for ?2 and thought, well for that I must be able to find something among them which will make the effort worthwhile. When I got them home (I hadn't even seen them before I bid) I was stunned. They were obviously from the estate of someone recently deceased and represented his life, with books from the 1800s through to the modern era. There were dozens potentially worth ?5, ?10 and even one or two worth ?50 or more.
So, it seems the old adage, "If it sounds too good to be it probably is" didn'tt hold true for me in this case. In conclusion, I shall simply say..WAHEY!!!!"

nipping with Steve
Mood:  surprised
Now Playing: Sniffage - wash my Cortina you wastebasket
Topic: chocolate wimmin
Although I was working, I managed to nip over to my home town fine arts auction yesterday. I arrived too late for the books, which were too expensive anyhow, but I grabbed up a lovely watercolour of a castle in Scotland. I placed this on eBay before Diana fell too in love with it, though if it doesn't sell I will not be disappointed as it would look nice in our house. I think that it needs to return to Scotland though.
It should be a popular action as it's well executed and in great condition. My puzzlement with the Hocking books continues. I have had loads of email from people asking if I have such-and-such a title. I will list the remainder next week but they have been good business.

bottle mania
Mood:  bright
Now Playing: lightbulb and fenugreek podules
Topic: striped whelks
I went to an auction near York yesterday with the intention of stocking up on books. An advert in a newspaper indicated that there would be books but when I arrived they were few and far between. So, rather than go away empty handed I decided to stick around to see what else I could pick up.

I struck lucky too. I bought three cases of old bottles circa 1900. No one else must have spotted them (there was only I and an old man bidding), yet as I was loading them into my car three people approached me and asked if they could buy some. I just said to each of them "This was an auction mate. If you wanted them, you should have bid". I don't intend getting caught out by selling something out of the back of a car only to find out later that it was worth loads of cash. In any event, there were three lots of bottles and I bought only one. I let the old boy have the other two as I am nice like that and I didn't want to be greedy. He must have been in his 70s or 80s, so probably he was alive when most of the bottles were in use.

I even stuck around with him until he got them in his car as this particular auction is notorious for its light fingered punters and stuff often goes missing between hammer down and payment and the rule is that once the hammer goes down, it's yours.

I was talking to one chap later who didn't know about the thieving scum element and he told me he bought a box of goods just for an old spirit level. When he went to collect the box after paying, the spirit level had disappeared. Sound about right.

One rather strange thing happened later. As I was sitting in my car enjoying a refreshing bottle of water, the auctioneer came up to me and asked about the bottles and whether there were any by a certain maker. There were and he said his mate collected them. I would have thought he would have gone through the bottles before auctioning them. Oh, and another odd thing. A guy tried to buy my sack barrow off me as I was loading up. It's all go in the busy world of auctions.

I also bought a world war two brass compass on which I hope to make a good profit. They are going for good money on eBay.

**Incidentally, I have developed a name for people who go to household auctions where goods are cheap if not mostly worthless. I call them CRAPHOUNDS, which I think suits them (and me) perfectly as they rummage through all the boxes of rubbish in the hope of finding a valuable item.

Everything is for hock
Mood:  caffeinated
Now Playing: bean can aerobix
Topic: yarblock
It's interesting to know what interests people. I have a love of old books and for a lot of the time I feel as though I am on my own. No one bids or they go for low prices. Yet books from the 1800s and earlier have a special feel. The paper is better quality than those made today and the bindings are often far superior.
However, once in a while my faith in the world is restored. This week has been one of those times. I have had for auction on ebay a number of volumes by a 19th century author called Silas K Hocking and they have attracted a wave of interest. They are smashing books anyway but their popularity caught me by surprise and I have had emails from across the world inquiring about the titles I hold. Don't get me wrong, they are not especially valuable books, but people seem to love the author. So to all you book lovers out there who don't give two hoots about paperbacks, thanks. You have made me a happy chappy.

Random Thoughts about how to succeed on Ebay (or not
Now Playing: Here are a few things which may help you to become a successful eBayer - and a few things to avoid
1, Don't get over excited. If you see something you want, fix a price in your head and stick to it. Don't get sucked into the excitement of beating someone to the punch - you'll end up paying over the odds.

2, NEVER pay a lot of money for something you cannot fondle, caress, smell, lick or stroke. Come on people, paying #6,000 for a car on the basis of a couple of pictures and a small description is just bonkers.

The eBay mantra is that most people are honest, which is probably true. What is also true beyond question is that some people are also dishonest. And criminals never sell items for #2.99 - they want a big sting and then they're gone. So, take care when buying art, cars or anything else costly.

3, When you lose an auction, don't stress. There will be a similar item along in a day, a week or a month.

4, Don't be afraid to plug your auctions at every opportunity. We ALWAYS include our username, shopwindows, when we're leaving feedback for other people. It runs along the lines of THANKS FROM SHOPWINDOWS:ANTIQUARIAN/RARE BOOKS,EPHEMERA,POSTCARDS,Cds,PAINTINGS. Note that we use capital letters (very few people do, so it stands out) and we always get as close as possible to the 80 letter message capacity which is the largest eBay allows.

5 - If you get down to the last few hours and no one has bid and you don't want to let the item go for 99p because of it takes just as much effort to wrap and post a 99p items as it does a #99 item, why not revise it by whacking it up to a 10 day auction. It's amazing how many times something with no interest suddenly takes off.

6. Never finish auctions on a bank holiday. No one stays in to bid.

7. Beware of big sporting fixtures or special occasions. I once listed some stuff not realising it would end slap bang in the middle of the European Cup. What a waste of time.

8. Don't finish auctions while people in your host country are still at work. It amazes me how many auctions end between 9 and 5. If I spot something I put a snipe on it and often win, simply because there is no one around to bid against me.

9. If you have something which will appeal to a foreign buyer, list it so it ends at a time suitable for the country involved. For example, I listed a whole host of American History books at 3am one Sunday morning (I had pre prepared all the listings on Turbo lister and simply had to upload them at that time, when I got in from the club ). They Yanks are usually on board by then - everyone sold to America or Canada (which isn't that surprising I suppose)

Buying goods at real life auctions
Now Playing: bonkercockie wallpaper flockie

The most important piece of advice is to remember the rule of three - you must sell all items for three times more than you paid for them in order to make a REAL profit. Remember, the first 33% recoups what you paid for the item, the second 33% covers your costs (buyer's premium, transport costs, ebay listing and postage costs, ebay final fee), the final 33% is your profit. (The other one percent should be handed to a small canine wearing a duffel coat and different coloured Wellingtons. He may be the next Pope, or perhaps Paddington bear.)

Here is a selection of other info which may be of use..

1, Buy what you know. If you know about books, buy books.

2, Stay away from things you know little about - or research the subject. You'll get stung if you buy something about which you know nothing. (ask yourself why no one else bid for it|).

3, Ignore No 2 if you find something so cheap that you can't loose. I often buy boxes of 20 or so books for #1, simply because no one else wants them. There is always at least one book among them which will make me money. Sometimes I buy a box of stuff for the container - where would you get a plastic tub for #1?

4, Don't forget that real life auctions charge a buyer's premium which can add anything from 10-20% to the purchase price.

5, When considering profit remember to take into account time and distance. The box of books you buy for a tenner may have cost double that when you take into account petrol money getting to the auction, parking fees, sandwiches and pop.

6, Be prepared to wait. In an auction of 600 lots no one except traders will bid for more than half a dozen items. Sod's law dictates they will be late in the day, which means a lot of waiting around.

7, Never leave an absentee bid if you can avoid it. You will often find that you win the lot for your maximum bid - even when no one else bid against you. Some auction houses hike up bids to make more commission.

8, Try to go to midweek auctions. Most of the hobby buyers are at work.

9. Get to know who are the traders. If you bid against them you will almost always win. They know at what price they can make a profit and most often they will not go higher than that.

10, Remember, if you lose an auction don't fret. There'll be another one along shortly.

11, If you are an auction regular, traders will sometimes try and teach you a lesson by bidding up an item of little value then pulling out leaving you saddled with it. That hasn't happened to me yet, but I have seen it done to others and if you keep your ears open you can often here traders plotting this tactic.

12, Try and stay friendly with traders. Buying at auction is the way they make a living and they don't take kindly to people taking potential profit from them. I often speak to traders and try and find out which lots they are especially keen on. If I'm not too bothered about those lots I let the traders know I'm not going to bid against them. I have bagged numerous bargains when they have returned the favour. One trader agreed not to bid on a box of books even though he knew they contained three volumes worth at least #100 each. I won the lot for #14 - and all because I had done the chap a favour at a previous auction. He knows I owe him a favour and will call on it in the future.

13, If you want only one item from a multi item lot, find that friendly trader and ask if they want to split the lot. Often you will get the item you want for a knock down price - and you don't get saddled with lots of stuff you don't want.

Digging deep for peepy sneep
Mood:  accident prone
Now Playing: ice cream jam tarts and faint hearts
Topic: kerfuffle
I attended an auction in the seaside town of Scarborough, North Yorkshire, today. Pound for pound, it is the most expensive in the area. Bargains are few and far between and everything goes for top dollar. Books are bonkers, so I leave well alone. What would cost #20 for three boxes elsewhere will often top #100 in Scarborough. Today was a specialist sale featuring pictures and nautical items. I bought two pictures - both watercolours from the 19th/early 20th century. I got a bargain on one (and I just said bargains were few and far between and have place it on eBay. The other - well, I'm not sure what to do with it...it's a stunner but it is also very large...too large for my house if I'm honest.
The last picture I sold went very well, and I doubled my stake but an oil of some ships didn't sell, probably because I moved it to 10 days when no one bid on it. I have relisted that one at a lower price.
Mickey Mouse comes to an end tomorrow. There is a #50 reserve on it and if it reaches that I'll be happy. I will not less it go for less though as it is worth that.

experiments in time and sound
Mood:  lyrical
Now Playing: Ferreting without guilt
Topic: creationism as a meal
All the experts say that eBay auctions are more successful and attract more bidders if you include a gallery picture when you list an item. I have never been convinced of this fact. I largely sell low priced items, often starting at 99p or thereabouts and so a gallery option costs an extra 15p. It all adds up you know.
Anyway, I decided to conduct an experiment, so I included gallery pics on some of my auctions over the last month and, you know what, it doesn't seem to make any difference at all to the end price.
The only thing it benefits are visual items such as paintings or models. I sell mostly old books, which often have plain covers, so this could be one explanation - a green cover is a green cover.
So, if anyone disagrees with me, get in touch. I would welcome some additional feedback.

too hot for what
Mood:  bright
Now Playing: athlete 24 hours
Topic: melifluous
Wow, it must be 90F outside today. I was gonna list a few items, but I need to chill...geddit! Anyhow, it's father's day and I must go and present the old boy with a few gifts and a card. He will be awaiting my call. Mother has gone to a car boot sale to sell some of her old tat.
Catch ya'll laters....

happenstance
Mood:  vegas lucky
Now Playing: cat nip and cotton budz
Topic: milk training whoosh
Another Saturday, another auction, although not the one I had intended to attend. I enjoyed too much alcoholic excitement at a charity show hosted by my father yesterday and as a result I overslept. So, my trip to the coast became a trip of about 500 yards to my local auction house. And there's more...the items in which I was interested had already gone when I arrived so I ended up buying a plastic Mickey Mouse flying a plane from about the 1950/60 era. Very collectable though, so it should sell. one of my paintings has reached its reserve, the other has no bids with four days to go but strangely has 11 watchers. Why don't people bid? i don't understand it. I am holding an auction here. I won a large number of vintage photos from one of my favourite sellers in America. If you want just about the best service on eBay, take a look at edge-online. His stuff is top notch and rapidly sent, brilliantly packaged.

singing with sheeps
Mood:  flirty
Now Playing: mind harp and zebra crossing.
Topic: Day of Teriffics
hey...spoilt for choice on Saturday, with three auctions on the go in my area - one in my home town, the other a few miles away on the coast and the third in a nearby city. The latter is always ridiculously cheap but sells loads of rubbish. My home town auction is a specialist toys and collectables affair so is likely to be expensive, so I am looking towards the coast with the most. Picked up seven boxes of books there last time for a pittance. In any event, gotta go for the cheap option as I dont have much money left after the blessing last week.
Keep your eyes on my eBay auctions next week as I may go for the bizarre. The photo is me holding court at our reception, while Di looks on in awe..which is nice.
Bonkercockie peeps

Purple prose to the power of three
Mood:  don't ask
Now Playing: Oooo eee ooo aaaahh aaaahh
Topic: throat yargle
Got married again on Saturday - well kind of. We had a church blessing to make up for the fact that we didn't invite anyone to the real wedding in Scotland. It went down remarkably well. Diana and I went to the church early to greet out guests and get them seated. This enabled us to calm our nerves and get ourselves in party mood. The vicar was great and put us at our ease, and we managed to pledge our vows without fluffing the lines.
Earlier in the day, I had been to an auction in my home town to take my mind off the impending events. I bought several paintings which I plan to list on eBay in the coming days - including one rather exceptional oil painting from the 1800s of a sorcerer building a fire.There was also an oil of two ships and a mock Gaugin in pastel. It is signed with his name but is obviously a fake - or else I got one hell of a deal

who do you think you are
Mood:  smelly
Now Playing: cuppa a tea mate
Topic: norman wisdom
What is it with some people. I listed a load of stuff as buy it now items because they have a specific value and I don't want them to go for less than a certain price. Also, I am not in any rush to get rid so they can sit in my shop for a couple of month. Yet people still insist on watching them..I ask you...it's not an auction IT'S A BUY IT NOW....THAT MEANS, YOU CLICK THE BUTTON AND YOU BUY IT NOW...IT WON'T GET ANY CHEAPER...SOMEONE ELSE MAY BUY IT WHILE YOU ARE FAFFING AROUND. For our American viewer, faffing means dilly-dallying, procrastinating or generally buggering about.

The perils of paintings
Mood:  accident prone
Now Playing: de harmonised candy floss
Topic: Lifting
Hhhmmm...the perils of paintings. Bought a pictured from an overseas ebayer. It wasn't expensive and it arrived quickly. They gave me good feedback and sell dozens of pictures a week. When it arrived though, it had three slits and one hole in it - none of which had been mentioned in the text. Immediate negative? I don't know. I will probably want to buy from them again as they are probably the biggest on ebay. By the way, the holes must have been there before shipment, as there were no dings or crushes to the box and the packaging was immaculate.
Damn.....

Auction missed, alcohol blamed
Mood:  crushed out
Now Playing: nose flute and tom toms
Topic: Nutrition Log
I have a Victorian scrapbook for auction at the moment, which seems to be taking off, and an oil painting which only has one bid so far but which has more watchers than any item I have ever auctioned. Which is nice. I reckon it will be snipe city arizona on that one as the auction ends..

I was scheduled to go to an auction in Goole today (where the locals are know as Goolies for obvious reasons), but I wasn't fit to drive on account of the fact that last night I imbibed a little excessively on the old wobbly water. So, instead, I sat at home and researched the art market, its prices and its practices. why would anyone else be interested in this information. Well, they wouldn't really. But I am bored so I thought I'd share it anyway. TTFN.

Pom-a-long-a-ding-dong
Mood:  lyrical
Now Playing: both or either
Topic: Running
Popped a couple of books on the site this evening before I got destracted by Murphy's law, the tv programme not the, er, law. Also sold a book on flowers and plants for #144, which was a result for me and for the buyer (I bought it for substantially less than that, but the cheapest on abebooks.co.uk is #600).
I love selling books and buying books but it takes a lot of book sales to make a lot of money. I may have to move over into art, or cars. That seems to be where the big money changes hands. I know a little about art, but nothing about cars...so guess which one I may go for. I have registered another eBay name, so that I can use it for pictures, so watch out for Exhibited...the new home for oil, and water and colours.